1. Simplify
2. Let it unfold
These had personal significance to me and I really felt that both were a good way of going into the new year and avoiding the self-inflicted stress of over-complicating my life and a tendency towards, shall we say impatience? They have served me well so far, and I wrote about the first in my last newsletter and my understanding of how simplification could be a good thing. And now I review the year to date, I am realizing that the second, is also open to interpretation as to what it means to the individual – when it’s a good rule to follow and when perhaps life needs a bit of a nudge!
I think that any clichéd advice such as the two I have pinpointed can be applied to an individual and only have value if that person is in need of a change in attitude, way of living/working. So if there is anyone out there who, like myself, wants everything to happen NOW, the idea of “letting it unfold” can be a great shift to make. If however, a person has a tendency towards inaction, procrastination and indecision, it could simply be a way of letting them off the hook and be a negative way of viewing the world. So again, we come back to “First, know yourself”! If you are feeling uncomfortable with not knowing the outcome of a situation, the first question to ask is:
• Is it in my power to reveal the outcome sooner? The second one might be:
• Is there value in my knowing the outcome sooner?
Taking time to reflect on these two things can produce interesting awareness. For example, it may well be a situation that you have no power to change. That the answer lies with someone else and when the time is right, all will be revealed. Not much you can do about it other than let it go! When we make a conscious decision to do this, our anxiety about the outcome reduces. (The Serenity Prayer has not stood the test of time for nothing.)
The second one may produce the answer “yes”. “If I knew more NOW then I could make other decisions and move forward with a Plan.” We love to plan. What lies behind this is the need for control, for self determination and a desire for being in charge of our lives. Nothing wrong with that. But there are times when knowing the outcome of a situation earlier, may not be the best thing. Perhaps other things will change in the coming weeks, months that will provide more information and allow you to make a better decision when the outcome is finally revealed.
This year, for me has been a wonderful year of “letting it unfold”. If I had had the answer earlier, I might not have the opportunities that now exist. When we work with clients, this simple exercise of asking those two questions can be very helpful in letting them decide what action to take and what goals to set. We don’t always help clients move forward. Sometimes we help them sit “in the muck” while life runs its course and they become clearer on what to do. If we understand what this feels like, then our empathy increases.
